L.A. Mayor Antonio Villaraiogsa Issues Statement on Today’s Signing of Phony, Fake, Smoke & Mirrors Budget (That Wall Street Won’t Be Buying)

[CAPTION: Look, I’m giving it to you, straight. We solved our budgetary problems and we’re gonna have it ALL! I wouldn’t lie to you.]

Cue: Martha & The Vandellas, y’all…cause it’s time for “Dancin’ In The Streets!!!” WE DID IT!!! GREAT TASTE, LESS FILLING! The city really CAN have it all!!! Problem solved! Crisis resolved!]

No, but seriously: Steve Perry just called. Said he’s, “Still Not Believin’,” and wants to warn the street-light people.

A MESSAGE FROM L.A. MAYOR ANTONIO DOUCHEARAIGOSA ON SOLVING EVERYTHING!:

“Today, I was proud to sign a budget that preserves core services and makes the necessary structural changes to put our City on a path to fiscal sustainability. With this budget, we are able to maintain police hiring to attrition, reorganize our fire department to maximize resources to better serve the needs of our communities, restore library service to six days a week, allocate funding to fill 300,000 potholes, and provide funding to allow Recreation and Parks to open new facilities.

Critical city services would have been reduced due to furloughs if not for the significant sacrifices made by our hardworking employees. Their willingness to come to the negotiating table to help the City preserved jobs, maintained services and put thousands of city employees back to work full-time in service of the residents of Los Angeles.

I’d like to thank the City Council for their thoughtful deliberation on this budget. They improved upon the proposed budget, removed borrowing, and included additional funding to support summer youth jobs.

We have arrived where we are today thanks to the collaborative nature of this year’s budget process. Together, we are turning a corner with a fiscally responsible budget that reinstates this City’s commitment to core services.” – Los Angeles Joker-Ass, Clown Antonio Villaraiogsa

[If you feel relieved, now…call Zuma Dogg: I am selling condos along the L.A. River. Wake up every day to the sound of a streaming river, where you can kayak, just steps away from your door. Tourist packages, also available.]

Here’s an account from LA Times:

But not everyone was happy with the budget.

The firefighters union protested the approval of a controversial Fire Department redeployment plan, which calls for trucks or ambulances at about one-fourth of the city’s 106 fire stations to be put out of service.

And the police union complained about the roughly $120 million in cuts levied against the Los Angeles Police Department.

Around $80 million of those cuts come from the elimination of overtime pay for cops. About $41 million of the LAPD’s budget cuts have not yet been detailed.

LAPD Chief Charlie Beck said last month that the department’s ability to close the $41-million gap rests on whether city negotiators can extract sufficient savings from the police union.

A spokeswoman for Mayor Villaraigosa said Thursday that those negotiations are still ongoing.

Other budget cuts include a 10% reduction to homelessness programs and a more than 6% cut in graffiti removal efforts. The city’s system of neighborhood councils and the City Council itself had their budgets reduced 10%.

The Recreation and Parks Department saw its budget effectively cut by $19 million when the council voted for reductions and a requirement that the department pay for some city services, such as water and trash pickup.

The increases include 20% more money for pothole repairs, and the return of Monday library hours.

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